Most of us are seeking and looking for something. We want to love and be loved, to cherish and be cherished, to understand and be understood, to desire and be desired, to learn and teach, to give and receive, and to right and sometimes to wrong. We are constantly looking for the meaning of life, meaning of our existence, and meaning our experiences. It is in the search of these feelings, emotions, meanings, and experiences that we find our identity but we also risk of losing ourselves in this constant search.
I am turning 33 this December, and I have looked, searched, and found pieces of what I want and desire but never knew what was "the thing" that makes me joyful, content, and happy. Last night, after a conversation with John and some thinking, I realized that the source of my happiness comes from simplicity. My childhood, teenage years, and adulthood - up until this point have all been pretty complicated. The complication comes from the past and creating complication is almost my personality and my second nature. When I live in the complication of the past or the ones that I create, I am never truly happy. It is when I simplify my life that I find peace, joy, and happiness.
My attempts to search for the fulfillment in life have mostly been external - a relationship, a friend, a pair of shoes, a dress, more money, the next promotion, etc. Those attempts have always failed miserably leaving me even less satisfied and sometimes empty. When I am touched and moved by simplicity, those moments are often the best times of my life but always short-lived. Last night, I finally realized that, for me to be happy, I have to protect my happiness. Protecting happiness is a moment by moment choice and I will have to learn to let simplicity linger and shorten the life of complexity in my life. I am looking forward to protecting my happiness...
2 comments:
Hello Anny,
Looks like you had a fabulous trip! The mountain climbing sounded difficult, but you were committed and you conquered it! That's great.
How are things over there? Hopefully you guys are not affected by the crisis. The market jumps up and down here everyday following the state's movement... But so far we are not affected too severely!
It's great to come here and read bits and pieces that are inspiring and worth thinking. Thank you for sharing.
Gina
Gina, thank you for the comment. We had a great time on our trip and yes the mountain climbing was hard but we did it.
the market is crazy, I wanted to write about it but it's too volatile to write anything that remotely makes sense.
Thank you for reading the post and always sending feedback... I've enjoyed writing and thinking too. Very inspired by ILP and you should look into it.
Love, Anny
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