Halloween

Too bad that I won't be in Sacramento this year for Halloween. I'll be on the plane to NYC tomorrow night but hopefully I can at least see some people in costumes in New York. I wonder if New York City's parties are better than waiting on kids to show up at the door. I think so, so I must be getting old...

The past several years, Jim and I have dressed up, handed out candies, and went out for adult beverages, so we always had a good time! The kids and teenagers show up at our place as spiderman, superwoman, geisha (or some kind of Asian ghost), star war characters, red necks, and all kinds of interesting costumes! Our neighborhood will have a hundred some people come through for candies, I just love Halloween! If I was little, this will be one of my favorite holidays!

Tell me what you are going to be for Halloween and send me pictures so I can share the experience and excitment! Happy Halloween!!!

Commitment

It is hard to keep a commitment. Commitments can be big and it can be small but they are all difficult to keep. Commitments can be as small as being on time, meeting due dates, eating healthy, exercising or it can be as big as achieving a career goal, supporting a friend or family, to committing to a person or a relationship.

These promises are hard to keep because we are used to not keeping our words. We procrastinate and justify our actions, we apologize when we don't REALLY mean it, and friends and family around us let us off the hook by not holding us accountable. Slowly but surely, our words lose value to others, to ourselves, then our confidence in ourselves begins to erode, and so we give this 'disease' a fancy name - commitment phobia.

It is very easy to not keep our words and find excuses to get out of these simple commitments. However, the consequence of this simple action is tremendous and sometimes daunting. To restore confidence in myself, I am striving to keep all of my words. If I don't keep my word, please don't let it slide without letting me know how it impacted you and others so that I can be held responsible for not just my actions, but my words.

Protecting Happiness

Most of us are seeking and looking for something. We want to love and be loved, to cherish and be cherished, to understand and be understood, to desire and be desired, to learn and teach, to give and receive, and to right and sometimes to wrong. We are constantly looking for the meaning of life, meaning of our existence, and meaning our experiences. It is in the search of these feelings, emotions, meanings, and experiences that we find our identity but we also risk of losing ourselves in this constant search.

I am turning 33 this December, and I have looked, searched, and found pieces of what I want and desire but never knew what was "the thing" that makes me joyful, content, and happy. Last night, after a conversation with John and some thinking, I realized that the source of my happiness comes from simplicity. My childhood, teenage years, and adulthood - up until this point have all been pretty complicated. The complication comes from the past and creating complication is almost my personality and my second nature. When I live in the complication of the past or the ones that I create, I am never truly happy. It is when I simplify my life that I find peace, joy, and happiness.

My attempts to search for the fulfillment in life have mostly been external - a relationship, a friend, a pair of shoes, a dress, more money, the next promotion, etc. Those attempts have always failed miserably leaving me even less satisfied and sometimes empty. When I am touched and moved by simplicity, those moments are often the best times of my life but always short-lived. Last night, I finally realized that, for me to be happy, I have to protect my happiness. Protecting happiness is a moment by moment choice and I will have to learn to let simplicity linger and shorten the life of complexity in my life. I am looking forward to protecting my happiness...

Abundance

Returning to the States and our home in Sacramento from a two week trip to Europe made me realized that we, as Americans, live in a country of abundance, and in many cases, excess of material posessions.

In most German restaurants that we patronized, we sat down and ordered our own water or other drinks, the restaurants do not serve you free water, you have to order your own water and pay for it. So guess what, Jim and I only had beers when we had our meals and we started craving for water after a week of beer hydration. The gas prices in Europe was unbelievable, not only that the prices were quoted in Euros, the unit that they operate in is in liters not gallons, no wonder they drive small cars and have brilliant transportation system for the masses.

Going into the global recession, we'll all have to learn to conserve and choose between our needs and wants on a day to day basis. The convenience and instant gratification that we have enjoyed for so long will be challenged and will have to change. However, I am not so sure if this is a such bad thing. We'll save more, consume less, support each other more, and waste a lot less. It is about time that our contributions to the world outweigh our out of control consumption appetite. This is not so bad is it?