Embrace

The Thailand trip concluded yesterday on the third day of Chinese New Year.  Parents and I left Angela’s place around 5am in the morning to catch our flights to Taiwan.  I am not sure if it is age, awareness, or what the reason might be, the trip to Thailand this time versus the trip six years ago seem completely different to me.  On this trip, I observed more, thought more, interacted with people more, and of course, loved it more!  Six years ago, I visited as a tourist.  This year, I visited Thailand more as a tourist-traveler - not completely a traveler yet but more so than the last time.

I want to say that Thailand is a precarious country with its rich and poor, haves and have-nots, luxurious resorts and slumps, and modern and traditional contrasting in my mind constantly and persistently.  However, isn’t most places, so called “developing” countries from a Western perspective, like Thailand?  I have no illusion that the divisions, contrasts, and contradictions exist in a country like Thailand only benefit a small group of people or corporations.  However, I wonder, if the system was not set-up to benefit the lucky few, will the Cambodian, Burmese, and Thai work so hard almost to the point of slaving themselves to ensure that their next generation have an education to speak for?  I wonder if the value of a day’s hard work will be as respected?  And I wonder if countries like Thailand will be as energetic, exotic, intriguing, and exciting without these paradoxes?
  
I am not at all suggesting that the gap between rich and poor should be exploited, but what makes this trip so powerful, beautiful, and touching for me is the fact that I was able to see these conflicts, embrace their existence, without judgment.

A piece of me

I woke up at 5 AM this morning, waiting in bed for the sky to turn on its lights.  I needed to go get the last swim on the island in before we return to Bangkok.  Yes, the last swim is a necessity, not just desire.

When I was in the ocean this morning, I intentionally looked at the mountains and its trees closer, observed their colors and forms.  I paid closer attention to the sun and how it radiates and illuminates the sky.  I listened more intently to the sound of tide splashing when it reaches the shore and the crackling noise within the ocean.  I took in deeper breath of air than I normally would have, I floated and observed the clouds longer than I have been, and I stopped myself from brushing salt water off my face as much as I could bear…  I made an effort to see, to listen, and to immerse myself for the last time on this vacation at this beach.  Realizing that the end of this wonderful vacation has finally arrived, I decided to make the effort to enjoy and soak in what was there to experience.  I saw more, heard more, and dunked my head in the water more…

The speedboat arrived as I was watching a father dive in the water to catch the Frisbee from his young son.  The way the father dove, put a smile on my face, but watching the Lima Coco staff off load other guests’ luggage made me a little melancholy knowing that it was our time to go…  As we walked out of the lobby / restaurant, we said goodbye to Noy and others, it was a sad moment knowing that the vacation at this magical place had to end, at that moment.  I stepped onto the speedboat as the Frisbee landed right next to the boat, I looked up and saw the smiles on all of their faces, I knew that they must be having just as much fun as I did over the past week.

Pathetically, we were the only two returning to the pier where Jok awaited.  Yes, I wish we took others with us – hey, misery loves company right?  As our speedboat chopped through the waves, the water beneath lifted up the boat and dropped it almost simultaneously as if we were going over the very uneven bumpy road to the other side of the island.  I looked back, we had already made the turn where the Ao Prao beach was no longer visible.  I saw only mountains, white caps, and the emerald green ocean.

As our licensed boat driver kept his course, I realized that you probably shouldn’t visit Koh Samed, soak in the sunset, enjoy the sea breeze, and get accustomed to its beautiful nature if you are not ready to leave a piece of you there.  The boat propelled forward with its noisy engine cutting the ocean behind it into a large triangle with the white caps falling and rippling into the ocean…  Underneath my straw hat with my hair flaunting in the air, I knew that I will always have a place for Ao Prao’s sunset and that I have left a piece of me somewhere on the beach…

SEA-food

Last night, we had our first ever dinner on the beach, unplanned.  You can say that it happened by accident.  We sat down by the dinner table and then Noi (our waitress) told us that we could enjoy our dinner on the beach, so we moved. 

Honestly, it was on the beach.  The real estate where we had our dinner table set up last night no longer existed this morning because of the tide.  Apparently, the seafood feast on the beach is a custom here at Lima Coco on Friday and Saturday nights.  After sunset, staff here brings out samples of raw seafood plates, fires up the grill, sets up the tables and chairs on the beach, and then, the feast begins.  The feast last night was not your typical Hollywood beach dinner.  It was family oriented, casual, and not-at-all pretentious.  Families gathered around the bigger wooden tables and lovers the smaller ones.  Kids played with their pails, buckets, and shovels on the sand right next to the parents’ tables.  (What a great way to get them to not run around but still have fun.  Let them play next to your tables on the ground, what a novel idea!)  Staff of the resort was jotting down orders, making delicious seafood, and running around the sand beach delivering food and alcohol to hungry, thirsty guests.

Everyone was busy and we were no exception.  Clams, prawns, mussels, scallops, and white wine were all amazingly fresh and tasty so we swallowed everything with ferocious speed.  When we ordered our 3^rd and 4^th seafood plates, Noi hesitated in disbelief! While waiting for more delicious seafood, we grabbed our wine and strolled along the shoreline completely mesmerized by the beauty of the beach, how lucky we (and these kids) were, and contemplated on when and how to get our parents to come enjoy this magical experience.

The exquisite feast lasted for a couple of hours followed by a fire show performed by Ball.  The kids were in awe and the adults were fully satiated and entertained.  Our evening ended with tropical cocktails, light music, and ocean splashing in the background.  I thought to myself, “I can really get use to this.”  

Paradise Lost

It was 4 in the morning.  I woke Jim up and he told me it was only 4.  I have been lying there for about 30 minutes with my eyes wide open before I woke him. 

As I lay in bed, I wondered if it was time for the sunrise and the morning swim.  I can’t believe that the first thing that crossed my mind every morning on Koh Samed has been “is it light enough to go swim yet?”  I had to go this morning because I floated in the ocean yesterday, as an experiment, to see if the tide was pulling or pushing harder.  I concluded that it was pulling harder in the morning as I floated away.  The experiment has to be repeated and the same result has to be drawn to make it conclusive.  I have to try again this morning.  My thoughts ran wild. I am obsessed with having the ocean all to myself.  I was in bed, the sea was calling.  I was powerless, just waiting for the sun to light up the sky.  “That’s why Lima Coco’s slogan is ‘the sea is calling’!” The lightbulb went off in my head!  It brought a smile to my face in the dark room.  

All of a sudden, I saw something moving on the wall.  Maybe it was just a shadow.  But it moved again and curled itself around, underneath the air conditioner.  The black wall-crawler was probably 8 inches long.  I stared in disbelief, scared that it would head over above our bed or down the wall.   I turned on the air conditioner, hoping the commotion will scare this animal to the right direction – away from us.  I have always been deathly afraid of reptiles - the kind with four legs that crawls like a confused marching soldier with same arm and same leg in synchronization – in this case, all legs.  No matter how beneficial these little (or big) creatures can be for the environment, please just stay away from me and don’t let me see them doing their thing!  (Needless to say, I will never switch to Geico insurance)  Did I say I am deathly afraid of reptiles?  After I turned on the AC, the reptile went behind the overhead AC unit.  I got up, turned the light on, woke Jim, and told him about the reptile.  He looked, there was nothing!  He fell back to sleep after he told me the time.  I can’t go get help if it’s only 4am.  Defeated, I stayed awake, read my book, surveilled the AC with my peripheral vision.  But seriously, what was I going to do if the animal emerged?  I made up my mind that I was going to scream to wake Jim but I was going to head for the door flee to safety.  As I battled with my sleepiness, my paranoia, and my fear, I woke up late and missed my morning swim.

We went kayaking after breakfast as I asked the staff on the resort to check on our AC for the reptile.  I settled back in the lobby / lounge of our hotel after kayaking which almost killed Jim from the sea sickness.  Maybe it was breaking of the rituals yesterday and that the reptile was an omen?  Yes, I am paranoid!  Deathly afraid, I said!  I will follow the rituals for the rest of the day, so please please please, no more reptile on the wall.  

Guests

A boatload of tourists just arrived by the Lima Coco speedboat.  That was how we got here last week.  I didn’t understand what the staring was all about when we arrived, but now I do, as I fixed my gaze on those lucky guests of paradise.  The beach got busier the past 2-3 days as the weekend approached.  The guests are greeted with a mobile dock that’s attached behind a truck.  You can see everyone focusing their attention on the arrival of new guests, maybe because the ocean is so peaceful without the speedboat, or maybe because everyone reads the future of these newcomers and secretly wishing that it was them that just arrived, in envy, possibly jealousy.

Our guest of honor didn’t arrive on a speedboat last night.  He was born and raised here on paradise, I assume.  The little island cat was quite rude and a little intrusive, I might add. 

It was our second day watching the amazing sunset from the restaurant/lobby.  Where we sat, was directly across where the spectacle happens day in and day out.  The guests that have been here longer knew about the show and we compete for the best seats in the house.  The orange bright sun starts midway in the sky by seducing the clouds to turn orange, gray, and purple as it prepares itself for the dive.  The clouds seduced, tinted themselves.  The ocean glistened at the first opportunity to entice the sun to take its plunge.  From where we sat, people on the beach turned dark with only their silhouette visible as to avoid competition.  The dance and contest for beauty didn’t last long.  The calm, sparkling, red ocean wins.  It had swallowed the sun and the clouds dissipated in dusk.  As we watched all of this happen from our front row seat, we spotted this long legged cat that roamed the beach chasing little animals, possibly a crab, minding its own business ignoring the spectacular sunset.  He has probably seen too many of these same shows.  It gets old after a while even the sunset here on Koh Samed…

As our dinner arrived, the tiny cat, our guest of honor, decided that he would not only share a table with us, but my chair with me.  I fed him our leftover steamed fish.  He ate, and begged for more by jumping on to my lap.  I laid down the rules – nicely.  I asked him to sit on the other chair – incentivized with more fish of course.

Our guest was tired.  He laid on the chair next to mine after his meal.  He closed his eyes, dozed off, and showed no interest on what was going on around him.  More guests came for their feasts as we concluded our dinner. 

In the darkness, more speedboats pulled up to shore with glaring lights as more guests arrived for the weekend.  I stared them down, envious, and a little jealous.

Island Excursion, Heat Exhaustion

We wake at dawn and eat at dusk.  Doesn’t matter the time, it has been our routine since we got to Koh Samed.  Call it a “rut” if you will.  That’s what Mike always says, “You are in a freaking rut”.  We wake up early to dip in the sea, shower, and enjoy our breakfast.  After that, we read, I write, we drink, and we nap.  We don’t leave our room until it’s later in the afternoon for either a massage or for more drinks, then it will be dinner - served by the ocean.  In my defense, on this beautiful island, I call it a ritual not a rut.

To break the routine, we decided that we’ll go explore the rest of Koh Samed like we planned to do when we first arrived. The relaxing life at Lima Coco has made it hard to have the incentive to go anywhere.  Keeping our word, we called for a “taxi” to go to the east side of the island after breakfast.  The road was not paved; it was bumpy and filled with big, deep, and unforgiving pot holes.  They definitely need a Jeep on this island, this road is the only reason why a Jeep should be driven.

Our island excursion started out fine with the 200 baht taxi ride.  Although the road was bumpy, the taxi driver spoke sufficient English where he directed us to different places.  He dropped us at a tourism center that was a short distance from an east coast Koh Samed beach, a street where we could shop with farlung pricing, and a road to the other resort that’s owned by Angela’s friend.  We were set, and the taxi driver was going to pick us up in 4 hours.  Jim wanted 3 hours and I wanted 4, unfortunately, I got my way…  We checked out the crowded beach where all the younger tourists go (our beach had a lot more families whereas this one was an obvious single and farlung filled party beach) I shopped for clothing and accessories, and we checked out Lima Bella that’s on east side of the island.  By this time, all of my ambition to learn more about the east coast of Samed was all gone.  Sweat was not dripping down my face, but it was pouring from everywhere.  Jim and I had to visit the 7-11 twice to cool down, an ice cream and ice tea later, still didn’t solve our problems.  When we arrived Lima Bella on foot through more dirt roads, we didn’t look very “bella” at all.  The staff on the resort laughed at us in Thai.  Yes, we looked that pathetic while they were working in their black long-sleeved shirts.

Thank God that they were serving buy 1 get 1 free Barcardi breezers by the infinity pool.  The vast difference in living conditions between the town and resort was our saving graces.  Splashing water all over my face, sitting in front of a fan, downing several not so breezy Bacardi breezers, and rubbing ice everywhere (including my head) were not taking the heat away at all.  I think this is my first heat exhaustion on the trip.  Seriously, who’s idea was it to leave the comfort of our resort for this excursion?  Oh, it was mine…  I was so hot, dizzy, and sweaty that I had to take a taxi back to Lima Coco without finishing my breezer, playing with the long leg Thai cat, or Jim…

In the comfort of our air-conditioned bungalow, I decided that tomorrow, I will honor our ritual instead…  

Little things

I tip-toed out of our room in my bikini around 6 in the morning.  Since our arrival at Lima Coco, I have completely lost track of the day and time.  It was probably around 6 in the morning because it was getting bright outside.  Daylight started around 6 in Bangkok so I assume that it must be the same here in Ko Samed.  I have been waiting for the sky to light up since last night…

The flimsy doorknob made a clunk sound when I shut the door of our bungalow.  I ran towards the beach down the luggage slope.  There were people cleaning the resort, trimming grass, and sweeping the restaurant / lobby.  They looked at me as if I was crazy to be so happy so early in the morning.  I jumped in the ocean without warming up.  The water temperature was just right and there was no one in the ocean.  It was just me.  The ocean belonged to me!  I swam out to the deep side the ocean, way beyond where I can reach the bottom with my feet.  I turned around to face the land, marveled at the beach, the bungalows, and the mountains.  I thought, if God or gods had a residence on earth, it must be here…  I swam back closer to shore, stood in the spot where the tide pulls and pushes.  I stood in silence, watched and felt the pull and push of the tide for the very first time.  I am sure there are a lot of spots like this one, but where I stood, it was cool!  The sun slowly climbed up the mountains behind the resort and lit up the clouds above the ocean.  There I was, in the middle of nature, in the ocean, floating like an upside down jellyfish.

We had breakfast, so it must be around 9 or so because breakfast doesn’t start until 8.  We took a walk on the beach right away to avoid the heat later on in the day.  The gentle waves washed up tiny sand colored crabs that I just absolutely had to chase down.  Dad had taught me the crab digging technique on the beach, but these tiny ones were roaming free so it will save a lot of work for me if I caught one.  These little crabs moved really fast and after several attempts, I finally caught one!  Satisfied, we continued our walk between the shoreline where the waves meet the beach.  Dodging the bigger waves by jumping on the sand and letting the smaller waves wash off the sand on my newly painted toes was a treat in itself.

I settled in the hotel lobby with my books, sunglasses, camera, and sun tan lotion.  I can’t help but observe all the tourists that are getting ready for their first swim of the day in this hot morning.  They were all quite red already, like lobsters, but they lounged and swam anyway.  The staff of the resorts moved in slow motion completing their daily routine and the masseuse started with their first client of the day so it must be 10.

Life here is so slow and calming.  I am only concerned about the littlest things that happen on the beach, at the resort, in the ocean, and my tummy.  Who should wear their swimsuit and stroll down the beach and who shouldn’t?  Which holes on the beach have crabs in them and which ones don’t?  Which book am I going to read after I finish The Stranger?  If the sun rose from behind the mountains, it should set in the ocean that faces that lobby, am I going to miss it?  What will be my next drink and my next dish that I should order?  Relaxing means that these are not the least of my concerns but most of my worries!  If only if these were the only things that I am worried about, always.

I just ordered my first coconut of the day without vodka this time.  My next drink will be my first Johnny Walker on this island, probably around 11 or 12?

Lilly on the beach

A Norwegian girl, Lilly, with black curly hair has been coming by while I sat by the beach getting my foot massage (one step removed from another oil massage), pedicure, and manicure. She taught the Thai ladies and I how to say “fly” in Norwegian as she pointed to the flies that landed on my calf. “Flu-wa”! She said several times, slowly, correcting our pronunciations. Staff here on the resort told me that they have been here for the past two to three weeks so most of the staff knew her and adore her. They come here every year from Norway and this was her last day this year… I tried teaching her my name and the word “fly” in English, but she seems to have little interest. The staff tried to get a kiss from her but she refused. I asked her how to say kiss, she said, “suss”. Mind you, that she doesn’t speak English and I don’t speak a word of Norwegian (other than flu-wa) she understood what I was asking and taught us the word – thanks to the international language of pucker the lips.

Lilly and I are the lucky ones that get to sit by the ocean, listen to the wave splashing on the shore, while getting our nails painted and foot massaged. As I look over the general direction where her parents were, the ocean looked so calm, the grass and hills looked so green, the palm trees leaned so perfectly, and everything so peaceful and relaxed… We are the lucky ones that get to come here and enjoy this beautiful nature while being tended and cared for. We are lucky in the sense that we were born to the “right” places, the “right” time, and with the “right” parents. One can argue that Lilly at her young age get to enjoy the resorts and services for weeks every year, she’s luckier than I am. However, I am not going to rank our good fortune or with the slightest intention to minimize how lucky I get to spend this kind of time on this very beach.

This is the first time in a long time that I felt this relaxed. Perhaps, the last time, was six years ago at the same place here in Ko Samed. Since we arrived Thailand, I have been eating, drinking, sleeping, reading, thinking, and writing. All of which brings out the best of me.

Without the worries of work, career, the day-to-day productivity that’s required of me, I am able to enjoy thinking, solitude, and best of all - myself. It must be the indulgence of getting a massage under the palm trees and shade, with the sea breeze and sound of the waves gently tapping my face that I finally forgot about the worries of my modern life and found some peace, inner peace.

I looked over. Lilly was fast asleep, sunken in her massage chair, after being pampered on this peaceful and luxurious heaven on earth.

Floating Market

Speaking of Jok’s friend, he’s definitely not as honest as Jok. Angela has been using Jok for a very good reason... The Damnoen Saduak floating market in the Ratchaburi Province is one of the most popular tourist destinations, or shall we say “tourist trap”. This is one of the oldest floating markets in Thailand and it is probably the most crowded floating market with tourists these days. Prior to our trip, Jok told us that the long-tailed boats will cost about 40-60 baht per person for Thais and approximately 500-2000 baht for farlung (foreigners). He warned us, but he couldn’t take us. Guess where his friends took us? The farlung boat dock, of course.

“It’s 500 Thai Baht per person for the boat ride”, the boat owner said without blushing. “The taxi driver just told us it was 300 Thai Baht per person”, I protested. I wasn’t making this up. I wanted to see if Jok’s friend was taking us to the right place so I checked ahead of time. I didn’t argue when he said 300 baht per person, knowing he’s taking us to the farlung boat dock, at least, that was the cheaper end of the farlung price. Traveling with a blonde-hair husband that looks nothing like Thai, 300 baht wasn’t bad. The boat owner gave the taxi driver a look, he agreed. 300 baht per person and he assigned us this lady that was probably in her early 50s to row our boat. “Jim probably will end up doing some work too, maybe we should have paid full price?” I thought to myself.

The canal that leads to the floating market was narrow, narrower than I would have imagined. Our boat rower pulled over to the side of the canal to let a motored, long-tail boat pass right after we made our first turn. The waves that the motored boat stirred up, made me concerned that the greenish brown water will splash all over us. It didn’t, so I took the first breath of relief. Jim was still holding his breath because the boat was very unstable and I was rocking it by trying to take photos… Another six to seven motored long-tail boat passed by us before we reached the shops on the canal. (How come our boat was not motored and the motored ones always have the right-of-way?)

The shopping was quite interesting. The boat rowers will row the boats next to a store along the canal, the merchant who speaks multiple languages will guess your nationality, advertise in that language, then switch the language if she realizes that you are from a different country. So, I didn’t say a word so that we didn’t get harassed. Needless to say, that didn’t last long. We were coerced, we gave in, and bought a couple of purses, a dress, food, and some beers.  Haggling was fun though! Everything we purchased was more than 50% off! (I checked prices with Angie later and I got them for good prices) The best purchase was the boat noodle for 30 baht! The noodle lady covered all of her ingredients, spieces, and seasonings under a cloth.  She mixed the noodles, threw in the cooked meat, and ladled the soup in the bowl only when there's an order.  The cool thing was that the cooking and service were all done from her boat.  Hence, the boat noodle.  You enjoy the noodle on the comfort of your own boat and the boat rower will return the bowls after you leave. It was a small bowl of noodles but it was delicious! I had two and half bowls by myself (half of Jim’s that he didn’t finish) and I think that surprised the skinny Thai ladies including the boat rower! Beers were enjoyed with the noodles.  Aparently, riding under the influence with an open can wasn’t a problem at all!

An hour and half and plenty of sweat later, the boat rower finally made a turn and took us to the Thai Thai market. (Meaning - the market where the locals go) Yes, we were duped in believing the farlung shops were the actual Thai market. I was so hot at this point that I really wanted the boat to turn around, but we can’t leave without going to the “real” floating market, right?


The traffic was horrible in the canal. Yes, traffic. Boats that carry food, drinks, tourists, locals, and produce compete for space in the narrow canal. We got up close and personal with merchants and boat riders. Tourists were snapping pictures (including me), merchants were selling, rowing, and sometimes cooking, and locals were going about their day… Jim bought some coconut infused pancake snack from a boat that was four boats away from us stacked right against one another. The pancake lady skillfully passed the pancake snack to the merchant next to her boat and we were encouraged to pass the money to the boat rower next to ours... The transaction was complete efficiently with boats going about their own directions. We ate the coconut pancake snack in amazement of this orderly chaos.

I couldn’t take the heat anymore so we headed back to our car after 2.5 hours. On our way back to our dock, we saw people’s way of life on the canal. Kids playing along the canal, people lying in the hammock underneath their homes, boats parked in their boat “parking lot”, and women washing dishes in the canal. NO!!!! They didn’t just dip their dish in that dirty canal. But they did! Jim and I looked at each other and braced ourselves for a violent stomach ache after having consumed the boat noodles.

At this time, in the middle of the canal, we were solicited by our boat rower to tip her before we reached the last turn back to the boat dock. We dutifully complied.

This was a fun trip. It was hot, curious, exotic, dodgy, different, and very interesting. I’d recommend anyone to come to the floating market in Ratchaburi Province. Make sure you pay the Thai prices, go to the Thai floating market first, bargain for your purchases, and prepare your stomach to stomach some yummy boat noodles.

Conflict Resolution

Jok’s car is still out of commission so Jim and I rode with his friend instead. We headed out of Bangkok to the famous Damnoen Saduak floating market. The ride was smooth so I looked out of the window our entire two-hour ride to the market.

The highway runs through an industrial park; factories, chemical plants, scrap yards, other manufacturing compounds were everywhere. The side of the roads was piled with dirt, garbage, leftover construction material, and more dirt. As soon as I was ready to slouch back into my seat and declare that there was really nothing to see, and there it was, a golden, shining, architecturally fascinating temple that caught my eyes. Who built the temple here with such grand scale? Who worship at this temple? Do they need to have the temple here because working here can be so obviously depressing? Or maybe being allowed here to work is such a blessing that they built the temple to thank the Buddha for answering their prayers? The dirt piles, factories, and grand golden temples went on for miles, which to me, was such a contradiction...

Can you imagine living in a country so contradictory like Thailand? Not only the old and young are caught in between a different value system like the rest of us, the disparity between the super rich and dirt poor, the balance between the pursuit of capitalism and devotion to religion, and the living condition that is between modern high-rises with top-end Western amenities versus mud huts with absolutely nothing . How can a place and its people allow so much contractions and conflicts to co-exist? Could it be the teaching and practices of Buddhism? Or is it the hopeful and compromising nature of the Thais?

To thrive in a contradictory place like Thailand, what qualities and skills do you have to acquire so that you survive, and survive happily? I wonder, if I was living in this part of the world, what traits do I lack, as a product of Western education, will allow me to thrive? The answer to this question will probably improve my chances of resolving conflicts in my day-to-day seemingly “Western” world.